Saturday, November 3, 2012

Newborn Photos

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Cieran Ryker Wilson

WHELP! My baby boy is finally here! :) Thought I'd write down his birth story before I forget too much of it. To start off, my birth experience was nothing as I had imagined. It didn't go the way I thought or planned it would go. I had always wanted a natural delivery with no drugs or anything and I wanted him to come on his own time. I wanted what was best for my baby and not what was best or easier for me. This whole experience thought me to be open to new plans and ideas and that it's ok and not my fault if things don't go the way I planned. Because all that really mattered in the end was that I got this amazing little miracle here safe and sound :) Oh and his name is pronounced Sear-an....I get that question a lot.

So my due date was October 9th, which came and went really fast. Everyday I went past my due date was one more day of "when is that baby coming", "go walk more", "eat this and that", "jump up and down"...and so on and so on. Also it meant my baby was just getting bigger and bigger! So I saw my Doctor on Tuesday, October 9th and he said that if my baby didn't come before Friday I needed to schedule an induction for that coming Monday. For me, being induced was like a bad word. I didn't want it! I knew it wasn't the safest option for my baby and I knew it would involve a lot of drugs and time. I always just thought he would come when he was ready. But I trusted my Doctor and that he had mine and babies best interests at heart. I guess I should say that for weeks I had been dilated already. At 38 weeks I was 1cm dilated and 60% effaced and at 39 and 40 weeks I was 2cm dilated 70% effaced. (I was sad when I didn't budge at my 40 week appt.) So I thought for sure he would come on his own before I had to be induced so I wasn't worried. But Friday came and went and he still hadn't come so I did schedule my induction and still hoped and prayed he would just come on his own before then. I was always worried that I wouldn't know when I was in labor. I never had Braxton Hicks or anything like that. Just mild cramping here and there. So on Saturday the 13th I had in my mind already decided that he wasn't going to come on his own and just accepted that I would be induced that Monday. I still hadn't packed a hospital bag or anything, because again I thought he's not coming before Monday so I'll pack it later........

Saturday afternoon on October 13th around 3pm Scott comes home for lunch from work and I was feeling fine, just emotional about everything that was going on, so he decided to stay home with me and not go back to work. We decided that Saturday night would be our last night just the two of us, so we wanted to make a date out of it. We started out going to my Moms house and then to Scott's moms house to say hello and then on a drive around the hospital to see where we would park and explore Springfield a little bit and then we wanted to go to dinner. Well around 7 we were done driving around and about to head off to dinner at PF Changs when Scott realized he didn't have his phone on him. He thought he left it at one of the Parents houses so we went back to his moms and it wasn't there and then we went back to my moms and it wasn't there either. My brother Chris was home though so we decided to go chat with him for awhile before we left. We were upstairs in his bedroom and I was sitting on his computer chair around 8pm when all of a sudden I hear this loud pop and popping sensation in my stomach......I was like....this isn't good.....!! So I say I have to go to the bathroom and head downstairs and that's when I feel this gush of liquid. I knew it wasn't pee! so it had to be my water breaking. So I went back to the bottom of the stairs and yelled up to Scott......"Uh Hunny! I think my water just broke! " and Scott was like... " Wait! Are you sure! are you serious! uh We have to go to the hospital!!!" and in the background I hear Chris saying "EW EW EW GROSS! Go to the hospital! " hahahahaha It was so funny. I never expected my water to break on its own or at least without any warning. That whole day I felt fine. And since I tested positive for Group B Strep my Doctor told me to head straight to the hospital if my water broke first. So Scott and I hop in the car and we have to drive back home first so I can pack a bag really fast and feed my cats and such and then off to the hospital. Well on the way back to my house is when my contractions started. Not even 20 min. after my water broke. And my contractions were close together and painful from the get go! Scott was freaking out! haha I have never seen him so anxious before. I was fine....It hadn't all hit me yet. I was just trying to get through contractions. So we get home, pack a bag as fast as we can and head to the hospital.

We arrived at the hospital around 8:30pm and checked in. We went up to the exam room so they could make sure that my water actually broke (which of course it had) and then we were officially checked into the hospital around 8:45pm. When they first checked me in the room I was 3cm dilated and 70% effaced. I thought awesome! It shouldn't take all night to get this baby here. I was having bad contractions that were 2 min apart since about 8:20, so I figured there was no way I could be in labor for more than 12 hours or even 8! hahahaha....little did I know..... and I was just happy that I didn't have to be induced after all :) So they get me all situated in the Labor and delivery room around 9pm and from there it was torture! The contractions were so bad! I was getting them all over my stomach, hips, and back and they were at least every 2 min. and sometimes back to back. UGH! It was the worst! It was the worst in my hips :( I tried everything to take the edge off. I walked around, sat on the ball, and I even went in the jacuzzi. It wasn't until the jacuzzi when I started throwing up so I got out and tried to walk some more. I was so tired! I hadn't slept well the night before and by this point I was exhausted and throwing up and in so much pain. Around 3am I told Scott that I don't think I could handle the pain anymore. I was literally falling asleep between contractions because I was so tired. I never wanted an epidural, but after 7 hours of hard contractions and very little progress in dilating and such ( I think at 3 am I was only at a 4 or 5) I just couldn't handle it anymore. I knew if I didn't get some rest there was no way I would have the energy to push this baby out.

So Scott gave me a blessing that I would know what to do and what was best for me and the baby :) And right after I knew I had to get that epidural. So at 3:30am the anesthesiologist came in and gave me my epidural (which honestly did not hurt one single bit!). After that I felt so much better. I could still move my legs and feet and feel the contractions, but they were doable and I could finally rest. Well Progress was still slow and around 7am I was at a 7/8 and then the nurses told me I had a fever and so they started giving more antibiotics (which I had been hooked up to since 9pm the night before because of my GBS) Then around 8:30am I was dilated to a 9 and was like yay! can't be too long now! Then all progress stopped. I wouldn't budge from a 9 and with my fever and all they were getting worried. So they gave me some pitocin to get my that final cm. It took 4 hours to get me to 10cm! Then around 12:30pm when I was finally all dilated and effaced they told me that the baby was still really high up and that he was also face up and stuck in my pubic bone. But they wanted me to try and push for one hour and see if he would come out on his own. Little did I know that along with a fever I also had an infection in my amniotic fluid.....but they didn't tell me until after I pushed for that hour as hard as I possible could! I wanted to get my baby out so bad, but after an hour of pushing he didn't budge and I was so sad. The Doctor came in and told me that they had to get him out and do a C-Section. I instantly started bawling! I was so scared! I had worked so hard to get him here the "natural" way, But it had to be done, because he wasn't going to come out any other way. Scott was amazing! he was so supportive the whole time and was so kind and reassuring that everything would be ok.

So around 1:45pm they wheel me into surgery and as they wheel me I pass all my family in the Hall telling me they love me :) I of course started crying again. I was so emotional and tired and scared and honestly felt like a failure a little because I couldn't push him out. Once I got in the room and had everything draped around me Scott came in and Sat with me by my head. Then at 2:08 pm I heard the most wonderful noise! On Sunday, October 14th My baby was here! He was beautiful and safe and cried like a champ :) It was one of the best moments of my life. Scott and I were so happy. Soon after I realized I wouldn't get to really see my baby. Because of my fever and the infection in my amniotic fluid the doctors were worried that my baby would get sick. So they brought him over to me really fast, and since I had the worst shakes of my life I literally couldn't not touch him because I was shaking so bad. I started crying again because I had waited and worked so hard to get this little guy here and I couldn't even touch him. They then took him off to the NICU and Scott went with him while I got stitched up and wheeled into recovery. After an hour or so in recovery Scott finally convinced a nurse to let him bring the baby to me really fast because I hadn't seen him really at all. The recovery room was kind of a big blur. They had to give me some meds to get me to stop shaking and also some pain killers for when the epidural wore off. When I finally got to hold my little boy I of course started bawling again! I was so happy. It was short lived though and they took him away again. I then after another hour or so got wheeled into the mommy/baby unit where I would be staying the rest of the time in the hospital. It wouldn't be until 10:30 that night that I would see my baby again. For 6 hours they had him hooked up on antibiotics and Scott stayed with him the whole time. I didn't want my baby to be alone. I was so sad that after everything I had only seen my baby for maybe 30 min in the 8 hours he had been born. But after Scott brought him in my room he never left my side :) I felt so bad for my little baby. He had a huge IV in his hand for 3 days ( mommy also had an IV for 3 days ) and it sucked. But I had my baby and that was all that mattered. I missed his first bath, weigh in and everything, but Scott was at least there so that made me happy.

I should also mention that when we first checked in the hospital the nurse told me that my Doctor wasn't on call and wouldn't be delivering my baby which made me very sad, because I love my Dr.! and he had been with me the past 9 months! So on the day Cieran was born I had a lady Doctor who would be delivering him. While I was pushing the phone rang and a nurse answered it and on the other end I could hear my Dr. telling her that he was coming in and delivering my baby and he was upset he didn't get a call that I was even in labor. So a little bit later my Dr. comes into the room in his church suit, tells me what is going on and he performs my C-Section. I had the most amazing Dr. who cared enough about me to come in on his day off to get my baby here. :) I was very happy about that. It definitely took some stress away knowing that I was in good hands :) (If you are in Eugene and want a great Dr. let me know and I'll give you his info)

It was a very traumatic experience but also one of the most amazing and incredible experiences I have ever had. My doctor told me that I did everything I could to get my baby here and that I pushed harder then most women would ever push. (my Dr. had to literally pull Cieran out of my pelvis! He was stuck really good and tight in there) In the end I know getting the epidural was the right choice for me and I know my blessing helped me choose it. In a way I think the spirit guided me because he knew I couldn't handle 11 more hours of natural labor just to end up getting the epidural before my C-Section. I feel blessed that I have an amazing family and husband who are so supportive.

So the stats overall are.....

18 hours of labor
1 hour of pushing
1 C-Section
3.5 days in the hospital with round the clock monitoring
tons of awesome visitors
Dozens of nurses
3 Doctors

and finally....

1 amazing 8lb 15oz 20inches long little boy who has changed my life forever. We are so in love! I could look at him all day and kiss his cheeks over and over again.

Yes, recovery is slow. But I am doing really well! In the end it was all worth it! All the pain was worth it! I would do it over again in a heart beat. Being a mom is that amazing. :) So my advice to all you soon to be mommies is to definitely have a birth plan, but don't be hard on yourself if it doesn't all work out. Everything about my birth experience was the opposite of what I had planned. I guess you just have to tell yourself you need to do what is the best and safest way to get your baby here and if that involves getting an epidural so you can rest and save some energy to push the baby out, then go ahead and do it. Every birth situation is different and go into it with a plan, but also be open minded about changing that plan if need be. I love being a mommy :) and Scott is the best daddy! He loves his little boy so much :) He can't get enough of him and neither can I. We are so very happy. I definitely left out so many details about his birth, but honestly it's all really a blur because everything was so crazy.

Also... Breastfeeding is HARD! It was so stressful and such an ordeal to learn because my baby had to be bottle fed right after birth to get his blood sugar up, so we had some challenges in the beginning. But I was determined to only breastfeed and after 5 days of stressful finger feeding and such we met with the most amazing lactation consultant and since then we are breastfeeding masters! well...we are getting there :) So more advice to soon to be moms....Don't give up! It will be hard but it is so worth it. Breastfeeding is the best and so worth it :) I definitely shed some tears over it this past week but I am beyond happy I stuck it out and never gave up :) are some pics of his first week of life.... sorry....a little out of order...

Getting Weighed (Thanks to my hubby for taking pics)

First time holding him in recovery



4 days old

Fist family photo in the hospital. (yes I look like crap....but you would too if you went through what I did! haha)

He had the worst cone head :(

Right after birth

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Maternity Photos :)

My very talented friend Jamie Jones was able to take my maternity photos for me and here are some of my favorites :) and yes....We are still waiting for baby....he is so stubborn! haha :)

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

40 Weeks!

And ready to POP! :) Come on little guy...Does he not realize that the baby tracker to the right is at ZERO now? haha

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Thoughts Before Baby

     So this baby could come any day now! It's crazy to think how fast time has flown by this year. I thought I would try to get some thoughts down before I forget and before I probably don't have the time anymore.

     Pregnancy has been pretty good to me. I can't really complain that much. I only had morning sickness for about 2 weeks and then it vanished :) I have always had good blood pressure and my weight gain has been pretty minimal. I never really got those pregnancy cravings or even the hormonal mood swings (which I'm sure my husband was really happy about). I have enjoyed every single kick, punch, jab, stretch, hiccup this little guy has thrown at me. I've been on average a very happy pregnant lady and I can say my overall experience has been great! I wouldn't say I LOVE being pregnant, but I definitely like it a lot.

     Of course with all the good there is definitely some down sides of pregnancy. I have since the beginning had horrible back/hip pain every now and then. I mostly would get it at the end of a long day and sometimes it would be so bad that when I went to stand up after sitting for while I literally could not get up or stand. I sometimes even had to crawl around for a bit until I could stand again. Luckily this wasn't every day, but it did happen more often then not. But again, even though the pain sucks, it still doesn't make me that miserable or mad/sad enough to really complain about it to anyone......Other than the Husband. HAHA!

     Oh how I am so lucky to have a husband like Scott. He truly is amazing! There honestly is nothing better than seeing his face every morning when I wake up. Having someone tell you you are beautiful everyday and laughs at all the dumb/silly things you do and say is Heaven. I love when he asks if the baby is coming yet because he really wants to meet him. It melts my heart how much he already loves our little boy :)

     I always try to imagine what that moment is going to be like when I first see Scott holding our baby. Even writing this it brings some tears to my eyes because it makes me so happy. I am so blessed to have such a strong example in my life. I know things are going to be different between us when the baby comes, and I know it's not going to be bad different. I am trying to take all the opportunities I can to be with Scott as just "US" before baby comes. Enjoying every cuddle and quick trip to the store and date night I can. AH! He just makes me so happy :)

     I definitely have fears about this baby coming so soon! It's crazy to think how much life is going to change. BUT I CAN'T WAIT!!! I do not feel prepared at all. I mean, I have read, and read, and read, and planned, and read some more, and cleaned, and cleaned. I basically feel as though I will never be 100% ready to bring my baby home or feel as though my house is clean enough or put together enough before he gets here. I have fears that I won't be good enough, or that he won't like me, or that I can't handle all the sleepless nights. But I know with Scott's help and my families I know I can handle anything. The best things in life don't come easy.

     I want to know what baby looks like! I think he will have Dark hair and brown eyes. I hope he is not super huge ( That will make my plans of a Natural delivery much harder! hahaha) I am convinced he is going to have a little piggy nose like I did when I was a baby and Scott did also. Haha oh goodness but I know he is going to be cute and that I will love him no matter what! Oh and we don't have a name for him yet.... we are going to wait until we meet him before we choose.

     I know this post is so jumpy and random, but my brain is so scattered lately with trying to get things done around the house and mentally preparing for what is about to happen.

     I can't wait for my parents and Scott's parents to be Grandparents!! It's going to be so much fun!!! They are all going to be so amazing and good to my baby. I guess there really just aren't words to express the joy I feel right now about my life. I have been truly blessed and am so thankful for everything I have been given. Hopefully my next post will be about baby! I pray everyday that labor/delivery will go smoothly and that my baby boy will be strong and healthy. If any of you want to jump on that praying train, I could use the extra strength :) Thank you all for your love and support. Wish me LUCK! :)

Thursday, September 27, 2012

38.2 Weeks!

Okie here you all go...The Swelling has kicked in and it shows! hahahaha

Monday, September 24, 2012

One Last Survey...

How far along:  38 weeks (15 Days to go!)

How big is baby:  The size of a Pumpkin! haha (somewhere between 18-20 inches long)

Total weight gain:  .......16lbs (But I guess that's not too bad!)

Maternity clothes: Love them! They make so many cute maternity clothes now! Also, they are super comfy!

Sleep:  Yeah....I don't really know what a good nights sleep feels like anymore. lol.

Stretch Marks? Oh yep...Plus a few in the last few weeks.

Best moment of the week: Knowing that he could come any day now! Feeling him move and dance around. He's a pretty special little guy already :)

Food cravings:  Still don't really have any. I never got that crazy urge to eat something. I will pretty much eat anything though.

Food aversions:  I find that any vegetable sounds pretty non appetizing right now, but I'll still eat them.

Labor Signs? Some Braxton Hicks here and there but nothing major. 
Movement: He moves like crazy! I sometimes will just watch my stomach jump around and wiggle. It's pretty funny! Who knows what he is doing in there sometimes. Lately he hasn't got his feet in my ribs so much, so that's been really nice :)

Gender: It's a BOY :)

What I’m looking forward to: Meeting him!!! I can't wait! Even though we are still getting things ready around the house, I still can't wait for him to come! Also I really want to be able to sleep on my back again! lol

What I miss: Sleeping on my back and stomach, sushi, not being hot all the time, not being clumsy, walking like a normal human.....and so on. Haha I still can't really complain much. My little guy has been pretty nice to me these past 9 months. Hopefully he stays that way through labor and delivery :)

Next appt: September 27th

Monday, July 23, 2012

29 Week Photo

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

26 Week Photo

Not the greatest photo but you get the idea. He is growing and so am I! Even though most days I still definitely feel more chubby than pregnant. haha

Pregnancy Survey

My friend Lauren did this on her blog and I thought it was a cute idea. I've been really bad at keeping track of everything so hopefully this helps.

How far along:  27 Weeks (13 Weeks to go!)

How big is baby:  The size of a Rutabaga or about 14.5 inches

Total weight gain:  Hmmm... depends on how you look at it. haha In the beginning I lost 8 lbs and then since have gained it all back plus some. So if you are counting from my original start weight I'm only up 3 lbs from where I started, but if you count it from when I lost the 8 lbs I have gained 11 lbs. I just like to say I have only gained 3 lbs so far. :)

Maternity clothes: Most definitely! They are the most comfortable and I don't feel like the baby is being squished in them. Also baggy T-shirts and sweat pants are awesome too for around the house.

Sleep:  Hmmm.... Depends on the night. Usually I don't sleep very well. I am up almost 3-4 times a night to use the bathroom. Ugh! It's the worst. Especially with all the summer heat. Trying to sleep while it's hot is a nightmare. My poor husband has to deal with lots of fans blowing on him at night. lol

Stretch Marks? Haha Well I've always had those so nothing new here....

Best moment of the week: I feel like baby boy was going through a growth spurt for a couple days last week because he didn't move a whole lot and I was SOOOOO! EXHAUSTED all day long. But the past couple days have been amazing. He has been moving all the time! Last night I was just laying in bed and he was going crazy and jumping all over the place. He probably had the hiccups :) But I love being able to feel him. It makes me smile everytime :) Also I was able to see him move from the outside a couple days ago. It was so crazy and amazing all at the same time. And of course when Scott can feel him (when he is patient enough to hold his hand on my stomach). It just makes my heart melt to see how happy he gets. :)

Food cravings:  I guess I'm not your typical pregnant lady. I don't really crave food that often. They only thing that happens to me is Scott and I will be talking about food and then he will mention something delicious and I will want it really bad randomly. But if I had to choose food I really like right now it would be...... Blue Slurpees, Any fruit, Sugared soft candy/gummy bears or worms, dolmas, lemonade.

Food aversions:  Not really. I am finding that I'm not leaning more towards the chocolate/cake end of things when I want something sweet like I used to. I tend to still like and eat most of the foods I did before, just in different ways.

Labor Signs? Nope Thanks goodness! 
Movement: Like I said above there was a few days where he wasn't doing much, but now he is trying to break through my stomach it feels like. He jumps all over the place. As I'm typing this I'm sure he has hiccups  because he is bouncing around a ton. It's so cute! I love it and love that he is doing so well :)

Gender: It's a BOY :)

What I’m looking forward to: Being able to meet him of course! and also being able to wear normal clothes again. haha

What I miss: Sleeping through the night, sushi, not having sore feet at the end of a long day, not having an aching back, clothes that fit. But honestly none of these things are that bad and matter that much. I'm so excited to have my little guy and would do it all over again!

Next appt: July 24th (29 weeks)

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Our House So Far...

Scott and I have been working on our house that we bought about 6 months ago on and off for awhile now. We still have a LOT to do, but we are very happy with what we have done so far. We still need to change out the ugly brown doors,baseboards,add more art, finish the kitchen, etc.... But I love my Yellow room! we just finished it this last week. We love owning a home and being able to do whatever we want with it. SO much fun....but lots of hard work! Now we just need to start working on the babies nursery. Here are some pics, so enjoy :)

Sunday, June 3, 2012

IT'S A......


We are so excited and happy! We always wanted a boy first....even though I secretly wanted a girl because of all the bows and cute clothes, haha ! But HE is healthy and growing fast and kicks me everyday. :) I can't wait to meet my little man! We are still tossing names around and probably won't settle on one until we meet him. We want to make sure the name fits him. Only 18 more weeks to go! Ahhhhhh so crazy. 

Wednesday, May 30, 2012


I'm completely in Love already with this little baby :) Gender announcement to come this weekend after we have our gender reveal party with our families! So excited!!

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

20 Weeks! :)

Wow! 20 Weeks already?! Time is sure flying and I'm happy about that. I still don't really feel as though it's real and I don't really feel pregnant yet. haha! I'm finally starting to "show" a little. But most people would probably just think I was fat.So far I can't really complain, I was only really sick for weeks 6-8 and then after that I felt pretty good. I only threw up 4 times and it wasn't that bad. Scott and I were able to hear the heartbeat at my 13 week appointment and it was amazing :) and then I got to hear it again at my 17 week appointment. Being able to hear/see my little one is so incredible! I had my first ultrasound at 6 weeks when the baby was only a blob and didn't look like anything but we did get to see the heartbeat on the screen and that was good enough for me. We get to find out the gender next week on the 29th! but we aren't telling family or friends till our gender party on June 3rd. I really don't care what I have, I would be truly happy with either. I'm so excited for Scott to be able to see our baby for the first time. I think it will help him and I feel as though it is real!! I seriously can't wait. I felt the baby move for the first time when I was 18 weeks and it was the strangest feeling ever, but also super wonderful at the same time. I only feel him/her every now and then but I'm sure that will change as he/she grows bigger and bigger. This is such an amazing experience and I am so grateful for all that I have been blessed with. I have incredible family and friends that are so supportive and excited for the baby to come. As of now I'm still working full time and will continue to do so as long as I can. I unfortunately do get pretty bad back pain sometimes at the end of a long day, but my baby is worth it and I just suck it up. I'm just truly hoping it doesn't get a ton worse as the weeks go along. Well I have to run to work! Just wanted to write a quick note and post the first picture I have taken so far in this journey. I'll definitely take more and try to keep people updated. We are so happy and we continue to hope and pray that everything will go smoothly. :)