Sunday, October 21, 2012

Cieran Ryker Wilson

WHELP! My baby boy is finally here! :) Thought I'd write down his birth story before I forget too much of it. To start off, my birth experience was nothing as I had imagined. It didn't go the way I thought or planned it would go. I had always wanted a natural delivery with no drugs or anything and I wanted him to come on his own time. I wanted what was best for my baby and not what was best or easier for me. This whole experience thought me to be open to new plans and ideas and that it's ok and not my fault if things don't go the way I planned. Because all that really mattered in the end was that I got this amazing little miracle here safe and sound :) Oh and his name is pronounced Sear-an....I get that question a lot.

So my due date was October 9th, which came and went really fast. Everyday I went past my due date was one more day of "when is that baby coming", "go walk more", "eat this and that", "jump up and down"...and so on and so on. Also it meant my baby was just getting bigger and bigger! So I saw my Doctor on Tuesday, October 9th and he said that if my baby didn't come before Friday I needed to schedule an induction for that coming Monday. For me, being induced was like a bad word. I didn't want it! I knew it wasn't the safest option for my baby and I knew it would involve a lot of drugs and time. I always just thought he would come when he was ready. But I trusted my Doctor and that he had mine and babies best interests at heart. I guess I should say that for weeks I had been dilated already. At 38 weeks I was 1cm dilated and 60% effaced and at 39 and 40 weeks I was 2cm dilated 70% effaced. (I was sad when I didn't budge at my 40 week appt.) So I thought for sure he would come on his own before I had to be induced so I wasn't worried. But Friday came and went and he still hadn't come so I did schedule my induction and still hoped and prayed he would just come on his own before then. I was always worried that I wouldn't know when I was in labor. I never had Braxton Hicks or anything like that. Just mild cramping here and there. So on Saturday the 13th I had in my mind already decided that he wasn't going to come on his own and just accepted that I would be induced that Monday. I still hadn't packed a hospital bag or anything, because again I thought he's not coming before Monday so I'll pack it later........

Saturday afternoon on October 13th around 3pm Scott comes home for lunch from work and I was feeling fine, just emotional about everything that was going on, so he decided to stay home with me and not go back to work. We decided that Saturday night would be our last night just the two of us, so we wanted to make a date out of it. We started out going to my Moms house and then to Scott's moms house to say hello and then on a drive around the hospital to see where we would park and explore Springfield a little bit and then we wanted to go to dinner. Well around 7 we were done driving around and about to head off to dinner at PF Changs when Scott realized he didn't have his phone on him. He thought he left it at one of the Parents houses so we went back to his moms and it wasn't there and then we went back to my moms and it wasn't there either. My brother Chris was home though so we decided to go chat with him for awhile before we left. We were upstairs in his bedroom and I was sitting on his computer chair around 8pm when all of a sudden I hear this loud pop and popping sensation in my stomach......I was like....this isn't good.....!! So I say I have to go to the bathroom and head downstairs and that's when I feel this gush of liquid. I knew it wasn't pee! so it had to be my water breaking. So I went back to the bottom of the stairs and yelled up to Scott......"Uh Hunny! I think my water just broke! " and Scott was like... " Wait! Are you sure! are you serious! uh We have to go to the hospital!!!" and in the background I hear Chris saying "EW EW EW GROSS! Go to the hospital! " hahahahaha It was so funny. I never expected my water to break on its own or at least without any warning. That whole day I felt fine. And since I tested positive for Group B Strep my Doctor told me to head straight to the hospital if my water broke first. So Scott and I hop in the car and we have to drive back home first so I can pack a bag really fast and feed my cats and such and then off to the hospital. Well on the way back to my house is when my contractions started. Not even 20 min. after my water broke. And my contractions were close together and painful from the get go! Scott was freaking out! haha I have never seen him so anxious before. I was fine....It hadn't all hit me yet. I was just trying to get through contractions. So we get home, pack a bag as fast as we can and head to the hospital.

We arrived at the hospital around 8:30pm and checked in. We went up to the exam room so they could make sure that my water actually broke (which of course it had) and then we were officially checked into the hospital around 8:45pm. When they first checked me in the room I was 3cm dilated and 70% effaced. I thought awesome! It shouldn't take all night to get this baby here. I was having bad contractions that were 2 min apart since about 8:20, so I figured there was no way I could be in labor for more than 12 hours or even 8! hahahaha....little did I know..... and I was just happy that I didn't have to be induced after all :) So they get me all situated in the Labor and delivery room around 9pm and from there it was torture! The contractions were so bad! I was getting them all over my stomach, hips, and back and they were at least every 2 min. and sometimes back to back. UGH! It was the worst! It was the worst in my hips :( I tried everything to take the edge off. I walked around, sat on the ball, and I even went in the jacuzzi. It wasn't until the jacuzzi when I started throwing up so I got out and tried to walk some more. I was so tired! I hadn't slept well the night before and by this point I was exhausted and throwing up and in so much pain. Around 3am I told Scott that I don't think I could handle the pain anymore. I was literally falling asleep between contractions because I was so tired. I never wanted an epidural, but after 7 hours of hard contractions and very little progress in dilating and such ( I think at 3 am I was only at a 4 or 5) I just couldn't handle it anymore. I knew if I didn't get some rest there was no way I would have the energy to push this baby out.

So Scott gave me a blessing that I would know what to do and what was best for me and the baby :) And right after I knew I had to get that epidural. So at 3:30am the anesthesiologist came in and gave me my epidural (which honestly did not hurt one single bit!). After that I felt so much better. I could still move my legs and feet and feel the contractions, but they were doable and I could finally rest. Well Progress was still slow and around 7am I was at a 7/8 and then the nurses told me I had a fever and so they started giving more antibiotics (which I had been hooked up to since 9pm the night before because of my GBS) Then around 8:30am I was dilated to a 9 and was like yay! can't be too long now! Then all progress stopped. I wouldn't budge from a 9 and with my fever and all they were getting worried. So they gave me some pitocin to get my that final cm. It took 4 hours to get me to 10cm! Then around 12:30pm when I was finally all dilated and effaced they told me that the baby was still really high up and that he was also face up and stuck in my pubic bone. But they wanted me to try and push for one hour and see if he would come out on his own. Little did I know that along with a fever I also had an infection in my amniotic fluid.....but they didn't tell me until after I pushed for that hour as hard as I possible could! I wanted to get my baby out so bad, but after an hour of pushing he didn't budge and I was so sad. The Doctor came in and told me that they had to get him out and do a C-Section. I instantly started bawling! I was so scared! I had worked so hard to get him here the "natural" way, But it had to be done, because he wasn't going to come out any other way. Scott was amazing! he was so supportive the whole time and was so kind and reassuring that everything would be ok.

So around 1:45pm they wheel me into surgery and as they wheel me I pass all my family in the Hall telling me they love me :) I of course started crying again. I was so emotional and tired and scared and honestly felt like a failure a little because I couldn't push him out. Once I got in the room and had everything draped around me Scott came in and Sat with me by my head. Then at 2:08 pm I heard the most wonderful noise! On Sunday, October 14th My baby was here! He was beautiful and safe and cried like a champ :) It was one of the best moments of my life. Scott and I were so happy. Soon after I realized I wouldn't get to really see my baby. Because of my fever and the infection in my amniotic fluid the doctors were worried that my baby would get sick. So they brought him over to me really fast, and since I had the worst shakes of my life I literally couldn't not touch him because I was shaking so bad. I started crying again because I had waited and worked so hard to get this little guy here and I couldn't even touch him. They then took him off to the NICU and Scott went with him while I got stitched up and wheeled into recovery. After an hour or so in recovery Scott finally convinced a nurse to let him bring the baby to me really fast because I hadn't seen him really at all. The recovery room was kind of a big blur. They had to give me some meds to get me to stop shaking and also some pain killers for when the epidural wore off. When I finally got to hold my little boy I of course started bawling again! I was so happy. It was short lived though and they took him away again. I then after another hour or so got wheeled into the mommy/baby unit where I would be staying the rest of the time in the hospital. It wouldn't be until 10:30 that night that I would see my baby again. For 6 hours they had him hooked up on antibiotics and Scott stayed with him the whole time. I didn't want my baby to be alone. I was so sad that after everything I had only seen my baby for maybe 30 min in the 8 hours he had been born. But after Scott brought him in my room he never left my side :) I felt so bad for my little baby. He had a huge IV in his hand for 3 days ( mommy also had an IV for 3 days ) and it sucked. But I had my baby and that was all that mattered. I missed his first bath, weigh in and everything, but Scott was at least there so that made me happy.

I should also mention that when we first checked in the hospital the nurse told me that my Doctor wasn't on call and wouldn't be delivering my baby which made me very sad, because I love my Dr.! and he had been with me the past 9 months! So on the day Cieran was born I had a lady Doctor who would be delivering him. While I was pushing the phone rang and a nurse answered it and on the other end I could hear my Dr. telling her that he was coming in and delivering my baby and he was upset he didn't get a call that I was even in labor. So a little bit later my Dr. comes into the room in his church suit, tells me what is going on and he performs my C-Section. I had the most amazing Dr. who cared enough about me to come in on his day off to get my baby here. :) I was very happy about that. It definitely took some stress away knowing that I was in good hands :) (If you are in Eugene and want a great Dr. let me know and I'll give you his info)

It was a very traumatic experience but also one of the most amazing and incredible experiences I have ever had. My doctor told me that I did everything I could to get my baby here and that I pushed harder then most women would ever push. (my Dr. had to literally pull Cieran out of my pelvis! He was stuck really good and tight in there) In the end I know getting the epidural was the right choice for me and I know my blessing helped me choose it. In a way I think the spirit guided me because he knew I couldn't handle 11 more hours of natural labor just to end up getting the epidural before my C-Section. I feel blessed that I have an amazing family and husband who are so supportive.

So the stats overall are.....

18 hours of labor
1 hour of pushing
1 C-Section
3.5 days in the hospital with round the clock monitoring
tons of awesome visitors
Dozens of nurses
3 Doctors

and finally....

1 amazing 8lb 15oz 20inches long little boy who has changed my life forever. We are so in love! I could look at him all day and kiss his cheeks over and over again.

Yes, recovery is slow. But I am doing really well! In the end it was all worth it! All the pain was worth it! I would do it over again in a heart beat. Being a mom is that amazing. :) So my advice to all you soon to be mommies is to definitely have a birth plan, but don't be hard on yourself if it doesn't all work out. Everything about my birth experience was the opposite of what I had planned. I guess you just have to tell yourself you need to do what is the best and safest way to get your baby here and if that involves getting an epidural so you can rest and save some energy to push the baby out, then go ahead and do it. Every birth situation is different and go into it with a plan, but also be open minded about changing that plan if need be. I love being a mommy :) and Scott is the best daddy! He loves his little boy so much :) He can't get enough of him and neither can I. We are so very happy. I definitely left out so many details about his birth, but honestly it's all really a blur because everything was so crazy.

Also... Breastfeeding is HARD! It was so stressful and such an ordeal to learn because my baby had to be bottle fed right after birth to get his blood sugar up, so we had some challenges in the beginning. But I was determined to only breastfeed and after 5 days of stressful finger feeding and such we met with the most amazing lactation consultant and since then we are breastfeeding masters! well...we are getting there :) So more advice to soon to be moms....Don't give up! It will be hard but it is so worth it. Breastfeeding is the best and so worth it :) I definitely shed some tears over it this past week but I am beyond happy I stuck it out and never gave up :)

Finally....here are some pics of his first week of life.... sorry....a little out of order...

Getting Weighed (Thanks to my hubby for taking pics)

First time holding him in recovery

LOVE :)

HOME!

4 days old

Fist family photo in the hospital. (yes I look like crap....but you would too if you went through what I did! haha)

He had the worst cone head :(

Right after birth

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Maternity Photos :)

My very talented friend Jamie Jones was able to take my maternity photos for me and here are some of my favorites :) and yes....We are still waiting for baby....he is so stubborn! haha :)

















Tuesday, October 9, 2012

40 Weeks!

And ready to POP! :) Come on little guy...Does he not realize that the baby tracker to the right is at ZERO now? haha